We’ve mentioned that the cause of insomnia is hyperarousal which prevents transition to a state of sleep (read more about this here).
Physiologically, the amount of arousal is regulated by the sympathetic-parasympathetic nervous system. Since this is an automatic and subconscious program, we (unfortunately) cannot influence it directly. The good thing is, however, that there are ways that we can influence it indirectly.
How do we influence our arousal levels?
There are many ways to go about it. Only a keystroke away by Googling the term 'solution to sleep problems' results in more than half a billion results. We can observe a wide range of possibilities, tools, approaches, and various types of medical and semi-medical sleep aids.
At almost every method or aid you will quickly find one or even several testimonials from a zealous ex-insomniac confirming the effectiveness of the specific method at hand.
Yet you cannot seem to shake off the sensation of doubt whether this specific method would also work in your case.
And your 6th sense would most likely be correct. Why?
Successful arousal reduction in an individual depends on many unique factors.
Such as his physiology, psychology, environment, and situation. And to discover what method would best suit you, you would have to take all of them into account to make the optimal decision.
You can also take an alternative approach which is to keep testing the methods, hoping that one will fit your unique composition, reduce the hyperarousal, and solve your insomnia problem.
This is the path the majority undergoes. I’m not saying that it is not the incorrect path, but keep in mind that it can take quite some time and financial resources before you find the right 'key' for unlocking the right solution.
But now comes the kicker -
even if or when you find a method that effectively disengages the sympathetic and activates the parasympathetic nervous system for you, it doesn’t really solve your problem.
You’ve only found a good coping mechanism.
This is like putting a fresh façade on a house that has suffered an earthquake instead of putting the effort into fixing it. It may look good, but one day it may just collapse.
Do not get me wrong - you definitely can apply short-term coping mechanisms, and if your sleeplessness is causing problems or even risks then you should definitively find a way to mitigate the situation.
But do not just stop there. Such short-term solutions that are based on distraction mechanisms may, sooner or later, become inadequate and the problem will flood you over again, causing even worse problems in your life. Not to mention your constant dependency on such aid and the costs associated with it.
So what would solving the problem mean?
It would mean the removal of the heightened arousal (psychophysiological activation) originating from mental, physical, emotional and/or behavioral sources.
The most efficient way to do this is to have an objective third party help you investigate your lifestyle through these areas, find potential topics that impair your ability to sleep, and also provide guidance on how to improve them.
How can You find the ‘Correct’ Insomnia Treatment?
Via coaching, consulting, or therapy. What is the difference between them?
Consulting offers theoretical expert advice. Therapy is oriented toward addressing and solving a specific issue. Coaching, however, includes the basics of both methodologies while keeping a very specific goal in mind, and constantly measuring your progress.
The same as an athletic coach holds a stopwatch to constantly monitor your speed, your personal sleep coach measures multiple relevant indicators and helps you reach your targets.
All your progress is constantly measured and compared. In this manner you transition from an intangible desire (e.g. ‘I want to sleep better’, ‘I can’t sleep’) to a specific problem (e.g. ‘I need 90 min to fall asleep six out of seven days a week’), and a goal (e.g. ‘I want to fall asleep in below 30 min’). This provides clarity and direction.
There is one more point left - to transform your goals from mere wishful thinking to reality the coaching also pushes you to act. This is the biggest contrast to consulting or verbal therapy where the focus is primarily on discussion and self-reflection, not so much on taking active steps to reach a specific outcome.
And we all know that without changing ourselves we cannot expect things to change.
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